Just Remus
by S. Meech
Summary: A set of 100 multilength fics all centered on one person: Remus Lupin. Will contain RemusSirius, fics of all ratings, and no consistent plot throughout the 100 chapters.
1. Admire

**Author's note:** This kicks off my acceptance of a challenge: 100 fics of any length about Remus Lupin. These do not follow any order and do not correspond with one another. That being said:

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Admire

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**

I love the way his hair flops into his eyes when he reads. Honestly, it's the only thing I can look at while we're in the common room at night, and it's_ murder_. He has to know that he is doing it–how could he not?

It started out simply enough, like all epic romances do. We were friends, Remus Lupin and I, and though we were not the very best of friends, we were close. We lived together in Gryffindor tower, his bed two over from mine, and he, James, Peter, and I became fast friends like no other students in our year. He, however, was the quietest, the most soft-spoken, and _damn_, was he smart. Top of our year, Remus Lupin was, from the get-go. How many nights I have spent curled up with his notes, studying frantically for exams or just admiring his handwriting, I honestly could not tell you.

The only problem with my epic romance with Remus Lupin is, in essence, the most fundamental aspect of it: the romance. We are seventeen, just about to graduate, and for at least three years–maybe more, who can say?–I have been staring at that little flop of blond-brown hair and wanting to push it back, He would look at me in that moment, the moment when my fingers shoved that rogue lock away, and he would smile and whisper, "Sirius." It would be my undoing, and everyone would see me melt into his lap and kiss him.

That would not do at all. First of all, there is no way Remus would kiss me back, especially in the middle of the common room with James and Peter gawking at us. No, no, it would need to be private, but even then, I happen to know that Remus harbours a _precious _little crush on Sinistra. _Please_. She could never handle that much man, much less that much wolf. I could.

_I could_.

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	2. Joke

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt two: Joke**

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Remus learned of Sirius's little joke the morning after it happened. Of course, he knew the night before when it had, but full moons tended to run together, and when he was first waking up from a night of slashing and chewing on himself, he could never remember anything properly except for the pain. However, when James stepped a tentative foot into the Hospital Wing before sliding his whole body in, a look of great fear on his face, Remus knew that something had gone horribly, horribly wrong.

Pomfrey had told him that morning that something was up, that his friends would need to talk to him about something very grave. "You're not in trouble, Remus. Merlin, child, you're not the one in trouble," she had whispered gravely as she bandaged a particularly painful cut on his torso, and he thought there were tears in her voice. He was unable to open his eyes, though, as a paroxysm of pain had just shaken his body mercilessly, and he gasped, raising a bloody hand to his mouth. Last night had been bad, worse than normal, and he wondered why.

And then there was James, teetering on the edge of the room with a nervous expression, and when Remus was bandaged and properly sorted out, he opened his amber eyes and smiled courageously to his friend. "James," he croaked, and reached out a shaky hand top him, gesturing to the stool where Madam Pomfrey was sitting just moments ago. She seemed to have Apparated from the spot, but he knew that no one could Apparate inside Hogwarts, so he surmised that she was just quick. "Sit. You're making me nervous. Where's Peter? Sirius?" He was talking quite a lot for being in so much pain, and he fell silent again.

James opened his mouth as though to speak then closed it before carefully making his way across the room and perching on the edge of the uncomfortable white stool. "Remus, there's something...Something happened last night. I– "

"_Fuck, Remus, I'm sorry_!" Sirius burst into the room in a tangle of wild hair and long, boyish limbs. The Hospital Wing door hit the wall with a loud_ bang_, but Madam Pomfrey did not come to investigate. Remus's eyes widened as Sirius flung himself at the bed, tears streaming down his cheeks, and he knew that he should be utterly terrified at the sight of them. Sirius Black was not the sort of boy to cry for just any reason; no, there must have been something tragic, something life-altering. "God, I didn't know what I was saying, Remus! N-now they're talking ab-about expelling m-me and– "

"Expelling you?" Remus sat up properly, ignoring the glass-shattering agony that ripped through him. "What are you talking about, Sirius? What have you done?" He expected another silly prank, that Sirius was either kidding or had pulled some stupid little joke of his that got him into major trouble. Surely they would never expel him, though. Surely...

"Don't be mad, Remus," James sighed heavily, and he drew his feet up so they were one rung higher on the stool than they had been. He looked even more uncomfortable, but it did not even register on the scale by which the unease in Remus's chest was measured. Something was terribly wrong. "But Sirius and Snivellus got into an...an argument yesterday, and, well, Snivellus knows." He sounded very reluctant to speak these last two words, and the moment he did, he winced as though Remus might hit him. Sirius let out a muffled sob, his face buried in against Remus's bandaged stomach, and Remus stared.

"What do you mean?" It was hardly a breath. Remus's face was so serious in that moment that James was frightened, and Remus saw the fear in his eyes. "Tell me–no, James, not you!–Sirius, what happened?" James had tried to speak, to answer, but Remus knew that this was all Sirius's fault. His heart was hammering painfully against his ribcage as realistation flooded through him, and he swallowed thickly. How could Severus know? What had been so terrible that Sirius–

"He was being such a-a git!" Sirius exclaimed, not able to look into Remus's eyes but certainly capable of pressing his cheek against Remus's tummy. "He was calling you all sorts of things, and he started insulting me and Peter and James and fuck, Remus, I'm so sorry!" He disintegrated on the bed, his whole body slumping heavily on Remus's legs, and Remus shoved him a little, wanting him to explain further, but he was clearly incapable.

James shifted a little, seeming as though he would like very much to console his friend, but instead he shook his head at Remus. "He told Snivellus about the passage, dared him to come see...you know. Snivellus did, Remus; he started down and had just opened the door when we caught him and–"

"_YOU WHAT_?" Remus suddenly bellowed, and he shoved Sirius completely off the bed. He hit the floor with a dreadful _thud_, and Remus was standing, miraculously, on enormously painful legs. Pins and needles were stabbing through his very bones, and he swayed dangerously before he grabbed the bed for support. "Sirius..."

"I was joking!" Sirius choked into his hands, and he shook his head. "I didn't think–"

"That much is obvious!" Remus snarked nastily, and he collapsed back onto the bed in a sudden wave of weakness. He shakily buried his face in his hands and took deep, ragged breaths before he waved his hand to James. James seemed to understand, for he grabbed Sirius and dragged him from the room, and Remus waited until the door clicked shut before he seized the bedpan beside the bed and vomited spectacularly into it. Madam Pomfrey was at his side in an instant, and he lay back on his pillows as she fussed over him, her hands fluffing his pillows and several potions being poured down his throat. He did not hear her when she apologised for Sirius's behaviour, and he hardly knew when he fell asleep, his hand clutched tightly in the matron's.

He could never trust Sirius Black again.


	3. Cold Sheets

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt three: Cold

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**

Remus had absolutely no desire to return to Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place after the battle in the Ministry of Magic, but he had to. All of the Order members were expected there as soon as they could get there, and though he knew that there would be no discussion until morning, he had nowhere else to go. Grimmauld Place had been his home for a full year now, and the last thing he wanted to do was go back out on the streets. It would have been the worst thing for him, especially after–

No. He could not think about it. Instead, he Apparated to London, approaching the house with a definite falter in his step, and he swallowed thickly before he raised a hand to knock quietly. There was a shriek inside the house, the familiar screaming of Walburga Black, and there was a pang in his heart as the door swung open, Molly Weasley standing there with horror on her face. "Albus has just sent...Remus, tell me everything!" she whispered urgently, ushering him in through the door.

"_Filthy half-breed! He looks devastated–perhaps he will die! Be sure to die on the street, you mongrel, you_–"

Remus did not waste any time in striding right up to the wall, getting so close to the painting that the sheen on the glass fogged with his breath. There was the sudden shattering of glass, a scream, and Remus was shredding the portrait, screaming at her in a fury unlike any he had ever know. "YOU! You fucking bitch, ruining everyone's lives, and now look what it's got you!" He was unaware of what he was yelling, but he felt Molly's hands on him, tugging, and then Arthur's hands appeared as well, and he was dragged back. The portrait was silent and Remus's chest was heaving with emotion. Sweat was beading and dripping down his face, his teeth were bared, but something was crumbling inside of him, and when he pushed the Weasleys' hands off of his shoulders, his voice broke as he whispered. "Not now, Molly. I expect...I expect someone else will..."

He did not even realise that his sentence was left unfinished as he stumbled away like a man drunk, heading for the stairs and feeling very heavy as his eyes suddenly swam with tears. His hands found the banister and he clutched it tightly, the very image of a broken man. There were hands on him again, assisting, and he did not resist them as they guided him up the stairs and to the doorway of the bedroom.

The bedroom. _Their_ bedroom. He was not turning the knob, but someone was, and he found himself pushed inside. "Sirius should be back soon, Remus." That was Molly, and he opened his mouth to choke something out, that no, Sirius would not be back this time, that–

He found the bed and fell into it, trembling. His hand traversed the sheet–the bed was unmade as it had been after their morning romp–and he reached for Sirius's spot, expecting to find him there, laughing. The sheets were freezing, so cold that he was sure that his entire body was frozen and he would splinter if touched. He moaned then, flashes of the wild sex that morning whiting out his vision, and he gripped the cold sheets in his fists, ripping them away from the old mattress and smelling them, smelling Sirius. There were voices downstairs and he heard a soft scream that seemed to echo in his brain, and he wrapped himself in the goose down duvet, inhaling and writhing in them as though their scent would rub off and create a new Sirius for him. There was a knock at the door, but he did not answer.

When he woke the next morning, quite unaware that he had ever fallen asleep, he smacked his lips and sighed, realising that he was hogging all the covers. "Sorry, Pads," he murmured against the duvet, and he unrolled himself from it before reached over to give Sirius's warm form a squeeze before easing back into slumber, but his palm only met the cool, untouched sheets on what was Sirius's side of the bed, and he rolled over to find his pillow empty. He did the only thing he could think of in that moment of confusion, of realisation, of pain anew.

Remus buried his head beneath the pillow and wished he were dead.

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	4. Stories

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 4: Stories**

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Remus Lupin did not feel as though his mum loved him anymore.

He was seven years old, a bright-eyed and bushy-tailed young man with beautiful, dark blond hair and an easy smile. He was plagued once a month by the full moon, yes, and had been for the past few months, but even though nightmares held his dreams hostage and he often woke up crying, he was a happy boy. He spent most of his days running about the moor on which the old cottage in which his family lived sat, and when it rained, he drew on bits of parchment and tried to steal his father's wand.

His mother, however, seemed different since his accident. His father had had something to do with werewolf legislation in the ministry, had made something difficult for them, as far as Remus could understand. As a result, one of the werewolves had come after Remus just a few months before. Remus had been out on the moor, playing in a small pond by which a clutch of baby ducklings had just hatched, and he was making a scene of naming them when the sun set over the hills. He could hear his mother calling him from the house, but he thought it would be a very good joke if he were to hide from her. She would laugh and laugh at him, he knew, and he loved his mother's laugh.

She did not laugh anymore. She spent most of her time in front of the television. "Go away, Remus," she would whisper, her voice raspy, and she would wave her hand at him. "Go on. I'm watching my stories..."

"I want to see, too," he said enthusiastically for, perhaps, the twentieth time, but his mother shook her head. He scowled and fell back, staring at her with narrowed eyes before he turned so she would not see his tears.


	5. Start Over

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 5: Start Over**

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"Fucking hell!"

"Goddamn, Potter, what are you trying to do!?"

"Get off of me, you great prat!"

It was a typical summer day at the Potters' home. The four of them–Sirius was living there, Peter was visiting for the day, and Remus was spending the remainder of the summer there–were playing Exploding Snap in the middle of James's bedroom floor, and James had caused such an explosion that they were all ashen-faced. Peter was cackling and Remus was trying his best to keep his composure as Sirius tackled James roughly, a whirl of too-long limbs typical of seventeen year-olds. James was swatting at him, trying his best to knock him off, but Sirius was persistent, and they scuffled briefly before Remus rolled his eyes and walked over to the fray. He reached down and plucked Sirius from the fight, glaring mildly at him. "Stop it. Honestly," he sighed, and he shook his head.

Sirius gave him a startled look. He and Remus were not getting on very well, not since their fifth year, and even though they still laughed and joked, Sirius noticed that Remus was a bit harsher with him than usual after he had done his best to get Snape killed. "Sorry," he mumbled, and he settled back down beside James, who shot him an odd look.

Remus huffed again and remained standing. "I'm going to go get drinks and a washcloth. Is anyone else thirsty?" he asked, one singed eyebrow cocked high into his forehead. No one said anything, and so Remus shrugged and disappeared, hurrying down the stairs and frowning as little flakes of ash flew off him. The Potters smiled as he passed, and he shot them an apologetic grin, but they laughed and waved him on, signalling that he could get whatever he liked from the kitchen down the hall.

He was in the middle of making himself a rather large lemonade when he felt a hand on his hip, and he froze. His lemonade overflowed slightly, and he felt a blush rise to his cheeks as he lowered the pitcher and began to mop up his mess. "Get off it, Potter," he said quietly, but when the other person turned him around, it was not James but Sirius, a strange sort of look in his eyes. "Oh, um..."

"I want to start over," Sirius breathed, pressing entirely too close for Remus's liking. He found that his back was pressed quite uncomfortably against the counter, and he thought about yelling for James to come get his puppy, but words seemed to fail him when he opened his mouth. "Don't," Sirius whispered, shaking his head slightly. "Just stop right there. Look, Remus, I don't know how else to apologise to you for what I did, and I'm sick of tiptoeing around you so I don't piss you off. Damn it, Remus, you...you don't have any idea what you do to me, do you?"

This phrase forced Remus to give pause, and he choked a little on his own saliva before he narrowed one eye at Sirius. "What?" he asked, incredulous. "What on earth do you me–" He was cut off quite briefly by Sirius pressing even closer, and he gave him a terrified, wide-eyed stare. "Sirius, stop this...stop it this instant!" His voice was much quieter than it should have been. Someone should have heard, someone should have realised that he was uncomfortable and come running, but no. It was he and Sirius, no one else, and his heart began hammering in his chest when one of Sirius's hands came up to touch his hair.

"Remus, you're the thickest person I think I've ever met," Sirius sighed, and he leaned in so close that Remus thought that Sirius was going to bite him. It was a wild, irrational thought that almost made him giggle, but he kept his face gravely serious. "Look, we're starting over whether you like it or not. Got it?" He did not even give Remus the chance to answer, for he heard James calling him now, and he took a step back, looking mildly nervous. "Got it, Remus?"

"Fine, fine!" Remus said, the butterflies in his stomach threatening to burst free, and when Sirius turned to run away, he took a deep, calming breath before turning back to the counter, strangely aroused and infinitely confused about everything.


	6. Roses

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 6: Roses**

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Remus Lupin sighed heavily to himself and stepped into the florist's shop, his eyes scanning over the numerous flower displays, and he shoved his hands in his pockets. He felt so out of place here, like a spot of yellow in a sea of blue, and he drew his robes tightly around him.

Perhaps Molly was correct. Maybe he should buy these flowers, roses, for Tonks and take them to her, end her moping about. "What do you mean," Molly had snapped at him in St. Mungo's, "that you're not 'whole' enough for her? Is it because of Sirius? It is because–" But Remus had silenced her angrily. He did not like her blaming Tonks's misery on Sirius, even though it was true. Yes, he knew he needed to move on, needed to forget that Sirius ever existed, that they had ever loved so fiercely, but he could not. He just could not forget it, no matter what.

And yet, he was becoming increasingly more lonely. Everywhere he went, he saw couples, their arms looped 'round one another and their eyes full of adoration, and it slew him. He had had that once, too. "You could have it again," said Molly's voice in his mind, and he knew it was true. Tonks was lovely, really, and such a fiery little thing! She would never replace Sirius, no, but she would do. She would do.

He stopped in front of a vase of black roses and made a face. Black, on the other hand, would not do. Those words, spoken in his mind, made his heart stop, and he closed his eyes briefly before he shook his head and took a calming breath. Black was no longer there...There was only pink for him now. He turned then to the pink roses, shutting out the dark ones, and he reached out to draw one long-stemmed specimen from its vase. It smelled just like she did.

He left the shop a little while later, three of the flowers clutched in a cheap wax paper, and he looked down at them critically. "Oh, this is ridiculous," he snapped, and he threw them into the nearest rubbish bin. Tonks would have laughed at him for even thinking of roses, would have snarked at Molly for suggesting them, and he knew it. She was so like his old friends, all gone, that he wondered if she would have run with them had they attended school at the same time. A streak of lightning ran across the miserable grey sky, closely followed by thunder. As if on cue, the sky ripped open and rain began to pour around him, and he groaned to himself. His robes were not thick at all and seemed to soak right through, and just as he considered Apparating in the middle of the Muggle street, the rain suddenly stopped soaking him.

"You should carry an umbrella," laughed Tonks, who was very close and holding her umbrella over both their heads. Remus looked at the multi-coloured umbrella in distaste and wrinkled his nose a little, feeling her wand pressing against his lower back. His clothes were suddenly warm and dry, and he smiled thankfully to her, just opening his mouth to say something when she leaned right over and kissed him on the lips. "I'll take that as my thank you," she grinned, and she laughed at the bewildered look on his face. "I saw you buy me roses, Remus."

"They weren't for you!" he spluttered, but he knew she saw right through him, and his cheeks burned fiercely. Lightning lit the clouds again, and the thunder this time was so bombastic that the two of them pressed closer. "They weren't for anyone at all. That's why I threw them out."

"You're a terrible liar, Remus," she snorted, and she knew in that moment when he allowed her to press right up against him that she had won. "Come on. Let's go back to my place."

For once, Remus did not say no.


	7. Foot

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 7: Foot**

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One foot. Over thirty centimeters. It was close enough to feel someone's breath on your face, close enough that you could_ almost_ count their eyelashes. One foot, to Remus Lupin, may as well have been a kilometer as far as the distance between him and the other side of the door leading into the Shrieking Shack. The transformation, he knew, would be just as agonising as it always was, but the moon had not risen yet and it was already eleven o' clock. He hoped beyond hope that maybe, just maybe, he would not transform that evening. As if his thoughts had forced the moon to reach its peak, he heard a nasty crunch in his spine and closed his eyes, screwing up his face.

The transformation began. There was a horrible lengthening of his spine, and he yelped, the sound inhuman, as extra vertebrae _pop-pop-popped_ at the base of his spine. His skin stretched, ripped, healed over where it had shredded to form a fleshy tail, which lashed behind him with such force that it slapped his own thighs. He screamed as his knees broke and bent backward; his toes sprouted huge claws in place of toenails, and the floor was bloodied with the burst of flesh. His feet changed shape completely, turning into massive paws, and in doing so, each bone broke and mended. New bones spurred out of old ones, his tissue rearranged around them, and he fell to all fours. His arms underwent the same treatment his legs received, and just when he was going to curse at his elbows shattering, a snout erupted where his nose was. The extension forced his mouth to join, and he opened it to groan, but a long, flat tongue lolled out, and Remus had the conscious thought, "Fuck..." a moment before his skin itched, fur sprouted, and all rationale left him.

He sniffed the air with short, huffy breaths, and his wet nostrils flared as he smelled humans nearby. Within a mile, at least! His large, canine head swivelled this way and that, seeking an exit, but no, the wolf recognised this place and sank to the floor in quiet fury. There was never an escape from this place, no matter how heightened his bloodlust was. He growled deep in his throat and bared his teeth. _There! There was flesh!_ He yowled as he grabbed his own leg in his teeth and shook it, tearing it, ripping it and tasting blood–but no, that was not the blood he wanted. He lifted his head to the ceiling and howled in agony the moment before he turned on himself again.

The sounds of wooden furniture hitting the walls and shattering accompanied the sounds outside, and the villagers of Hogsmeade tucked their children in a little tighter that night and were lulled to sleep by the sounds of a boy, fifteen, screaming in agony inside the head of an uncaring, unfeeling werewolf.


	8. Delight

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 8: Delight**

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Remus woke with a loud, "_Ooph_!" one early March morning, a cloud of noxious gas posing as his morning breath escaping his mouth and attacking his pouncer full-on in the face. "Phwoar, Moony!" James coughed, and he sat back quickly with a green tinge to his cheeks. "Go brush your teeth!"

"If you're going to be sticking your face in mine to wake me up, Potter," Remus huffed, "then I suggest that you keep your snide comments about my breath to yourself." He rubbed his eyes with sleepy fists and planted his feet, which tingled with the sudden movement after a long period of rest, firmly on the wooden floor of the dormitory. He opened his eyes and blinked the blur away before an outraged scowl overtook his face, and he glared at James nastily. "Potter! It's not even light out yet! Ten points from Gryffindor for waking me up!" he shouted, not bothering to keep his voice down because the other boys were up already, beaming at him. He knew that no points would be taken, as Prefects could not take points, so the effect of his statement was lost in the giggles of his three very best friends.

"You know what day it is, Moony?" Sirius asked, crawling along the floor and resting his head on Remus's knee like a great overgrown puppy. Remus got that distinct impression and smiled very softly, his hand lifting to rest in Sirius's wild hair. He always had a soft spot for Sirius, and to humour him, he shook his head. "You idiot, Moony! It's your fuckin' birthday!" Sirius exclaimed in a faux-shocked tone, and he reached under Remus's bed, fishing around for something. Just as Remus was beginning to wonder if he were being snagged by something that would not let go, Sirius pulled out a tiny little box and set it on the knee that his head was not occupying.

"What's this?" Remus asked quietly, eyeing Sirius strangely, and he lifted the small box into his hands. James and Peter had their eyebrows cocked as well, but Sirius shot them a look, and to Remus's shock, the two seemed to blush in the dark, and they suddenly "had to go to the bathroom." Remus did not buy it for a moment. Sirius had bought him something that was surely going to explode or do something that would coat the room in muck, and so it was with great reluctance that he opened the box. He winced the moment the lid disconnected, and he held his breath, waiting.

Nothing happened.

He opened one eye slightly before opening them both to see a small, folded piece of parchment lying upon the black velvet inside the box where a ring would normally have been stuck. His fingers plucked the parchment from between the folds, and he shot Sirius, who had an odd, choked look on his face, a strange look. "Written me a poem, have you?" he teased the black-haired boy with a rogue grin, and Sirius snorted and looked away. Remus unfolded the piece of paper and brought it up close to his face so he could read it in the very dim light.

_Close your eyes._

Remus did not even think to disobey. He closed his eyes dutifully, smiling to himself, for he expected the real gift to come now. Perhaps Sirius bought him a new Gobstones set or a lot of Honeyduke's candy, maybe even the pair of shoes he had been eyeing in the shop window in Hogsmeade. "I hope you didn't spend a lot of money on me, Sirius," he lectured, eyes tightly closed, and he grinned as he felt Sirius get close to give him his gift. "Well, let's have it."

The last thing he expected was a set of warm, pliant lips pressed to his. His eyes shot open, staring widely at Sirius's too-close face, and he opened his mouth to say something, anything, only to feel Sirius's tongue swipe across his bottom lip then slide into his mouth. Remus's breath left him in a great rush, and he felt his heart slamming against his ribcage as his hands lifted, seized Sirius's shoulders, and he was just going to push him back when Sirius leaned forward and knocked Remus onto his back on the mattress. He swiftly moved to lie atop him, his lips never having broken the seal of their kiss. Remus's fingers twitched before softening on those shoulders, and he finally relaxed against Sirius just as the other pulled away from the kiss and looked down into Remus's eyes in the darkness of dawn.

Remus was breathless, as, it appeared, was Sirius. A thousand thoughts raced through Remus's mind––what had just happened? Why had Sirius kissed him? Why had he, Remus, allowed it? And why, exactly, were they lying there, panting and staring at each other when they could very well be doing something more constructive with their mouths?----and he lifted his hand up to seize Sirius's shoulder. "Sirius, what…?"

"Happy birthday, Moony," Sirius whispered, and he smiled the saddest smile that Remus had ever seen. He started to get up, his shoulders sagging—obviously he had been expecting a different reaction—but Remus seized him and stared at him. "What is it, Moony?" Sirius asked, his voice slightly raspy. "Just let me go kill myself in peace, please…"

"No!" Remus growled, and he made a forceful gesture that did not mean anything at all. It was the picture of frustration. "What do you mean by it? Come to serve me some birthday humiliation? Are James and Peter having a laugh? Do you think this is funny?!" He had no idea why he was getting upset, but his voice decided to go mutinous and begin trembling. "W-well I have news for you, Sirius Black. I—"

"It's not funny!" Sirius snapped, and he got right in Remus's face. Their noses were an inch apart, if that. "They have no idea what I'm doing! They knew I wanted to give you something privately…Well, there it was! Fuck, every time I open up to anyone…" He kept on growling and snarling, but Remus did not hear it. It wasn't a joke? They weren't having him on? He felt frozen, and Sirius seemed to notice that Remus was staring at him funny, since he stopped talking and cleared his throat a little. "Moony?"

Remus blinked lengthily then leaned forward tentatively. "Are you trying to tell me that you fancy me, Padfoot?" he whispered, and he met his gaze. "Is that what this is?" His eyes searched Sirius's, looking for a trick, looking for any semblance of a lie, but there was nothing there, and he felt his hands shaking as he found Sirius's hands. "Is it?"

Sirius swallowed and looked away before he nodded and started to get up again, but Remus caught his wrist. "Where are you going?"

"Suicide off the Astronomy Tower."

"No, you're…Stay, Sirius." Sirius met his gaze again, and Remus shot a furtive look around before he seized Sirius and jerked him into the four-poster, closing the drapes before he pressed himself into Padfoot's chest. "You're a fucking idiot, Sirius Black," he huffed, and he felt a wave of delight crash through him as he leaned in and kissed Sirius for the first time.

* * *


	9. Wishes

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 009: Wishes**

* * *

"Ha! Look at him, he's so small!"

"Look at that, look! He's got scars all over his face! What a fag…"

Remus stared down at the ground as the walked through the Hogwarts Express for his first time. He was eleven years old, a tiny boy in robes that were a bit large on him so he could grow into them, and he knew that the boys that were pointing and laughing were just trying to sound older and funny. He had seen them clinging to their mothers for support before going on the train; they were just first years, too. He did not want them to see him looking so angry, or like he was going to cry. Instead, he forced a fake smile and walked into the first empty compartment he could find, slamming the door shut and sitting in the corner by the window. He hoped he could be alone for the whole train ride.

His mum had told him it would be like this, that the other kids would tease him and that he might have a lot of difficulty making friends if anyone found out he was a werewolf. As a result, he knew that he was going to be alone and friendless for his entire Hogwarts career. It was not a happy thought.

James Potter frowned as he made his way past some jeering boys on the train and peered into the windows of the compartments he passed. There, there was one that only had one person in it! He grinned and came in, sitting across from the small, mousy boy and leaning back. "First year?" he asked, and the boy nodded. "Me too. I'm James Potter."

"Remus Lupin," said the boy, and he met the other boy's kind face. "What er…What house do you think you'll be in?" He honestly thought that he himself would be in Slytherin due to his lycanthropy, but from what he had read of Slytherin, he knew it was the last house he wanted to be in. "I'll probably be in Ravenclaw."

James smiled and nodded. "I suppose I'll be in Gryffindor...Me Mum was, after all, and so was Father," he claimed, and he looked up as the compartment opened again. In strode a regal-looking boy, though he looked rather nervous, and he sat down beside Remus. "Who're you?" James asked, giving him the once-over.

"Sirius Black," the boy said quietly, and he stuck his nose in the air. "I'll be sorted into Slytherin, I suppose…Everyone in my family's done…" He saw Remus smile at him, and he smirked right back. "You too?"

"Maybe," Remus whispered, and he looked back out of the window. They might all go in different houses, these three, but he found himself wishing that they would not. These boys seemed nice enough, and they had not asked about the scratch on his face or the robes that were too big on him. He found himself hoping that, eventually, they could even be friends.


	10. News

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 010: News**

* * *

Lily was pregnant. Lily Potter, to Remus Lupin's amazement, was pregnant. What on earth was she thinking, bringing a baby into the war? Remus had been utterly shocked at the news, but he could never have shown it. Lily and James looked so damned happy about it…The last thing he could have done was tell her she was the stupidest person he had ever met.

Sirius was angry with him for expressing how he felt about the baby coming. "Look, Remus, our lives can't stop because of the war," he had snorted as he opened the door to their flat in London. "I mean, Molly and Arthur have got children, and they're in the Order, too. Nothing's happened to them…"

"Yet!" Remus had exclaimed, and he had shaken his head in frustration. "There's too much danger, Sirius! Too fucking much! You and I are ill-equipped to take care of the baby if something were to happen, and—"

"I don't care!" Sirius barked, and he shut the door hard behind them as they came inside. "If something DOES happen, we WILL take the baby, damn—"

"Of course we will, Sirius, but—"

"Enough!" Sirius was tired of being interrupted and interrupting, and so he stalked off to their bedroom, slamming the door. It did not change how Remus felt about this whole thing. Lily and James needed to get their priorities straight before someone got hurt.


	11. Strength

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 011: Strength**

* * *

The arc of Sirius's elegant body flying through the air made Remus's heart stop. He could see the triumphant look on Bellatrix Lestrange's face, and he wanted to kill her, but now Sirius was falling back to earth, falling back towards that veil from which he could hear the whispers of the damned, and then, Sirius was gone. He heard Harry yell from faraway, though they were standing right next to each other, and he seized the boy as he made the sudden movement towards the veil, fighting him with all his strength.

"Harry!" he choked, and he said some other things he could not recall as he held the howling boy back with all his strength. He wanted nothing more than to let Harry go and leap through the veil after Sirius, to pull him back, but he knew that Sirius was gone, Sirius was dead.

It was not fair. He had only been with him again for such a short time, only a few years…He wanted to break down and cry and slap Harry for having infringed upon his own private grief, but he merely struggled with the boy, clutching him fiercely and trying to ignore the incessant howling in his brain. He needed everyone to leave now, at this moment, so he could leap through the tattered curtain with dignity, but he did not. As he died on the inside, he held onto the only link to his past he had left—Harry Potter.


	12. Scream

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 012: Scream**

* * *

"I have a bone to pick with you, Lupin!"

This exclamation announced James Potter's entrance to the common room, and Remus looked up to see him stomping from the portrait hole over to the chair where the young lycanthrope was seated. "Yes?" he asked quietly, setting his book aside and looking up into the furious face of his friend. "What have you done now?"

"ME?!" James screamed, and he pointed an accusatory finger at Remus. At this point, the whole common room was staring at the two of them, including Sirius, who looked ready to pummel James. "It's YOU that's done something! I oughta kill you, Lupin!"

Remus's eyebrows furrowed, and he huffed quietly to himself. "Well, it must have been something really terrible, then. Go on, so I can tell you that nothing happened and to get on with it; I have studying to do," he said joylessly, and he met Sirius's eyes across the room. He held up a hand, and Sirius leaned back in his seat, though he looked no less angry.

"You are seducing my woman!"

A ringing silence fell over the common room at these words, and Remus met Sirius's eyes again before his face split into a wide, howling laughter. This sentiment was echoed throughout the room as Gryffindors of all years joined in, and James flushed a deep purple. "Shut up your laughing! Leave her alone, Lupin, or I'll—"

"You'll what, exactly?" This was Sirius, who was now standing beside Remus. "Scream at him? Pout because Lily obviously finds studious, quiet boys more attractive than pratty, obnoxious ones? I understand why you're upset; who'd have seen that coming?" He threw an amicable arm around Remus's shoulder, drawing him just a little closer than he would have any other bloke, and James looked as though his head would pop like a zit. "Yes, I thought so. Run along, James, and please…Next time you blame something on Remus, think first, eh?"

James, obviously embarrassed, fled the room. Remus smiled up at Sirius, and Sirius fought the urge to kiss him.


	13. Trust

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 013: Trust**

* * *

"Peter, you really can't do it like that…"

"Bullshit I can't, Lupin! I'll do it as I fucking please, and I'll thank you to stop hovering over me like my mother does! Get back!"

Sigh. "Peter Pettigrew, grow up. Look, you have to trust me, and if you do, I swear it will be over in…not even two seconds!"

"Trust! Ha! GET THAT HAND AWAY FROM THERE REMUS JOHN LUPIN OR I SWEAR TO GOD—"

"Scream at me again, Pettigrew, and I'll rip your leg off. Hold still so I can get it, and then it'll be over and done. Hold it…hold it…"

RIP!

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW, FUCK YOU, LUPIN, FUCK YOU!"

Remus collapsed into giggles and held up the flesh-tone Band-Aid, which still held a few of Peter's leg hairs as its trophy. "See? It's over!"


	14. Blind

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 014: Blind**

* * *

Remus's eyes were covered by a black satin cloth, and he swallowed. Hard. "Feel." The word was whispered in his ear, and he closed his eyes even beneath the blindfold before giving a little nod.

Tingling. The sensation of fingertips fluttering down his stomach. His mouth dropped open as his stomach jumped under those fingertips, and he lay back gladly on his bed. The coverlet was soft beneath his naked back, and he felt several folds somewhere around the region of his kidneys. His boxers were straining to confine his erection, and he could feel the button holding the opening shut as it nearly popped off. He took a deep, steadying breath and closed his eyes.

"A-ah…" A warm palm, so familiar, so rough, smoothing over his cock in his pants, and he threw his forearm over his eyes even though he could not see as the shorts were pulled down, baring him to the air. There was a draught.

Warmth. Wet. A completely new feeling, a feeling that made him want to cry out hoarsely, but he didn't. There was a soft chuckle as the warmth disappeared, and he scowled. "Goddamn it, Sirius, will you get on with it alre—heh. That."

He had never been blindfolded before, and it was something he did not fancy doing again as he fought the urge to rip it away and look down at Sirius's head bobbing between his legs, but Sirius was completely correct in saying that it would heighten every sensation. He had never expected to last long during this at all, and when he came hard into Sirius's mouth, he ripped the blindfold away and laughed at him.

"Never again, Black." 


	15. Spoken

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 015: Spoken**

* * *

"Remus, we need to talk."

Remus Lupin hated these words, and they had been too frequent in coming from Molly's mouth lately. He knew what she wanted to discuss, and he did not want to hear it; nevertheless, he set the morning paper down on the table in the kitchen of the Burrow and smiled complacently up to Molly. "Yes, Molly, what is it?" he asked, and he took a drink of juice.

Molly looked uncomfortable, and Remus was secretly glad of that. She sat down across from him and fidgeted with her hair for a moment before she heaved a sigh. "It's Tonks, Remus," she stated suddenly. "You know how she—"

Remus rolled his eyes and shook his head at Molly. "Once and for all, Molly, I have no interest in Tonks." She wasn't Sirius, didn't any of them get that? Why they felt the need to shove him into a new relationship so soon after…He shook that thought from his head and took another drink of juice to ease the ache in his heart.

Molly sighed and looked away, obviously embarrassed. "Will you even consider talking to her, Remus? Please?"

Remus sighed and shook his head. "Look, Molly…I'm sorry, but I've spoken. She's old enough to know when to quit." He did not give Molly another chance to speak, and he rose to his feet before fleeing the kitchen.  



	16. Bells

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 016: Bells**

* * *

_Dong. Dong._

Warmth.

_Dong._

Sleepy haze, curled fingers, church bells on a Sunday morning. You on a Sunday morning.

_Dong. Dong._

Rustling of sheets, on my back, your hand on my stomach under my shirt. One eye barely open, and you're so close to me. "You awake?"

_Dong. Dong._

"No."

I'm laughing quietly, hoarsely, and I clear my throat, glancing over to the clock. It's nine o' clock. "You're such a liar, Sirius."

"Mph."

_Dong._

It's autumn, and the sun is rising late today. The landscape is a warm red and gold, and you are dressed in red, too. You're such a Gryffindor. "Go back to sleep, Lupin."

_Dong._

"All right."  



	17. Sun

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 017: Sun**

* * *

Why do I love the sun?

The sun sparkles in her hair like it once shone in his. She is laughing and running by the ocean—we're in southern France for a holiday—and I'm walking along behind her smiling. She's beautiful, really, with her hair, today as bright and yellow as the sun, and her eyes. She doesn't even know the original colour of her eyes, though we suspect it's blue. The earth reflects blue under the sun.

I loved the sun with him, too, but the sun made him _crazy_. It doesn't make her crazy; it makes her laugh. I like her laugh. "Could Sirius stand you being such a grump in this weather?" she laughs at me, running back and seizing me around my waist. That bikini of hers in _scandalous_, and I love it when she presses against me in front of everyone. Yes, she's practically half my age. Yes, her bikini makes every one of you a walking boner.

"Sure he could," I claim defensively, and I wrap my arms around her thin frame. The wind whips her hair back, and I lean in to kiss her. "And I'm not a grump. I'm _thinking_."

"It's too hot to think, Remus!" It is, I agree with her, especially now that she's all pressed up against me. I'll bet she can feel how much I want her. Yes, I see it in her eyes, and she presses close to hide my shame. "Not that you could think anyway…You want to go inside?"

I nod and let her pull me towards the hotel resort. As beautiful as the sun is, as much as I love it, sometimes I must leave it for other important matters.  



	18. Pain

**Now, Sakai Michiba presents:  
Just Remus  
Prompt 018: Pain**

* * *

"Oh, _damn_."

Remus looks up as Tonks curses loudly, her hair a vibrant red and her clothes his—a pair of old pyjamas he'd had for years and lent to her on request—this morning. She had been cutting up leeks for lunch, as she liked to do on Wednesdays. "What's wrong?" he asked quietly, and he blinked when she turned towards him with her right index finger clutched in her left hand. There was a steady trickle of blood dripping from the pad of her finger, and she frowned. "Oh, bring it here," he demanded, and he waved her over. He blushed when she sat down on his lap and showed her the finger.

"Knife got away from me," she whispered, and she met his eyes with an almost mousy expression. They had not been together very long at all—three weeks—but she had insisted that he stay the night with her on Tuesdays and Thursdays. They had not even slept together yet. She had claimed that she got frightened and just having him there with her even though they did not share a bed help to alleviate her fear of the dark.

He nodded and smiled, summoning a washcloth from the counter and dabbing the blood off of the cut. She winced, and he laughed quietly, enjoying the weight of her in his lap. When the cut was cleaned, he healed it with a swish of his wand, and she smiled quietly as the cut sealed itself. "There you are," he said with a smile, and he lifted the finger to his lips. He kissed it.

Tonks blushed and wiggled slightly in his lap before she started to get up, but Remus caught her and pulled her back down. "Hey!" she laughed, and she slapped his shoulder playfully. "Pervy old man, you let me go!"

Remus shook his head and took a deep breath before he tilted her head towards him and leaned up to kiss her soundly on the lips. They were still a brand-new couple, still so very cautious around one another, and so this kiss caught her by surprise. She squeaked quietly into it then kissed him back, her heartbeat racing as Remus's mouth opened over hers. He kissed her roughly, and she knew he did not really know how to be gentle about it. Not anymore, not since Sirius came back from prison.

She was glad. She didn't like gentle. He was a werewolf, damn it! She kissed him back just as fiercely, and she laughed as his hands, his old, tired hands, lifted to her sides and seized her ribs in a teasing tickle. "You bastard!" she laughed, and she leapt out of his lap, flustered as she went back to the counter.

Remus frowned and looked down at the table. Didn't she recognise that as an invitation? His heart ached for Sirius, who would have had him in bed five minutes ago.  



End file.
